If You Only Knew What’s in Food, You’d Never Eat Again

horsemeatToday I am glad I don’t live in the UK.  Or at least that I didn’t eat frozen lasagna in the UK.

2219_findus-horse-lasagna-130208-findusCheddar cheese on lasagna?  That’s almost as bad as eating Mr. Ed!

Maybe I shouldn’t be so critical.   I love the Brits in most things, but  English food is scary as hell to begin with, at least to American sensibilities.  It’s not necessarily dangerous to eat horse meat, but it is culturally taboo, even in the UK where people eat really nasty sounding things like blood pudding and kidney pie and haggis.  I think as far as frozen lasagna goes I’ll stick with the Stouffer’s red-box stuff.  It may be mystery meat, but it’s still some tasty stuff.

Stouffer's_LasagnaThey don’t claim that the meat is beef.  It’s just “meat” which could be anything.

I think if we really knew what was in food we would never eat again.

 ???????????????????????????????Gravy happens.  And this stuff looks like puke. I want to know who tasted it to verify that it “tastes like beef stew.”  Used beef stew?

When my Dad was growing up on the west side of Marion, there was a dog food manufacturing plant about 2 miles from where he and my grandparents lived.  In the 1950’s horse meat was a major ingredient in dog food, as well as carcasses of various livestock. Back then, pretty much any meat source that could be rendered down was used in dog food.  The dog food plant closed down in the early 1980’s, (long after it had been made illegal to use horse meat in dog food) but I can still remember the stench of that joint if the wind was blowing the wrong way.  It was not a pleasant smell.

One night the horses they were keeping to slaughter the next day got out and followed the railroad tracks to my grandparents’ house.  Dad woke up and was screaming about horses running through the back yard.  Grandpa thought Dad was nuts until he saw the horses for himself.

Sometimes I almost get the vegans’ argument against eating anything with a face.  I couldn’t imagine eating an animal like a horse or a dog if I put a face on it, but then I remember that cats are obligatory carnivores, and I remember that most humans who espouse vegan eating really aren’t as healthy as they want to suggest, mentally or physically.  I just don’t think that smelling like an abattoir, (in spite of not eating meat?) having grey, scaly skin, braid-able hair on the armpits and legs, and straw-like scarecrow hair sticking up from one’s head are indicators of health.  Nor do I think wiping with reusable cloths or burying my car is a good idea to “save the planet” either.  I like an occasional Porterhouse steak.  I like my leather shoes,  I like to remove superfluous body hair, and I’d rather be dead than have dreadlocks.

hippies2Never trust the unbathed.

I understand meat-eating is a cultural thing.  Personally I find the thought of eating dogs highly offensive, but they do it in Asia.  I have no problem with eating rabbits, squirrels or deer, while some people I know think that’s the grossest thing ever.  I don’t care for lamb or mutton, but the dogs love it.  Supposedly that’s what their food is based on, but I really don’t want to know what’s in dog food.  It’s bad enough to consider what’s in food meant for humans.

meatyI found a taste tester.

I could save a lot of money this way.  Just shut up and eat it.  You just don’t want to know.

3 thoughts on “If You Only Knew What’s in Food, You’d Never Eat Again

  1. Your Space Friend Exitor says:

    Funny you should mention Stoffers “meat” lasagna. I was telling her that “meat” could be anything from eyeballs and brains to lips and assholes.

    • Sometimes it’s just plain better not to know what’s in food. My son is one of those picky eaters/ food inspectors. I told him that blind people do just fine without picking through their meals to remove mushrooms, hair, rat turds, whatever. That did nothing to dissuade him from dissecting his meals. He’s 22 years old and still picks through his food first. I don’t know what’s more gross- picking through one’s meal or just sucking it up and eating whatever’s there.

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