Proof that God Has a Sense of Humor, More Synchronicity in Action, and Deliver Me from Stupidity

I always wondered why little old men have hair growing out of their ears.   Apparently God must get a laugh to curse some old bald guy with plumes of waxy hair protruding from his ear holes.  It seems kind of normal that Dad has ear hair (he’s 64, and no he doesn’t care) but it’s creepy that Jerry does too.  Jerry really doesn’t like it when I tweeze it out with pliers, or with tweezers for that matter, but he is not sufficiently geezerly enough to justify sporting ear hair.  If he’s going to just let the ear hair grow he might as well go wandering about wearing those hideous old-man plaid Bermuda shorts (talk about clothes by Purina) that go up to his armpits, with black socks and sandals.   Yikes.

I am constantly reminded that humans too, are mammals, which explains why I have superfluous and undesirable hair sprouting out in all kinds of places that are awkward to shave and/or tweeze.  The hair removal battle is a constant war for me.  As we age everything seems to get bigger, hairier and closer to the ground, which is sad but true.  I know if I did not tweeze my eyebrows every other day or so I would have one voluminous and frightening unibrow that would overtake my forehead within a week.  I shudder to think what would happen should I neglect to shave my armpits and legs at least every other or every day as I generally do.  Within a month I could give Sasquatch a run for his money.  Yuk.

I’ve always thought human body hair to be rather gross, especially on a woman, and in many cases (such as ear hair and unibrows) gross on men too.  Hair is OK on one’s head,  on carefully sculpted eyebrows and lashes, and that’s pretty much it if you’re a woman.   I don’t mind dudes who have tasteful facial hair but that does not include wild eyebrows, unibrows, nose hair that just sort of grows into the moustache hair, or out of control beards.  There is nothing sexy about ZZ Top to me.  Clean shaven is much better for most guys.  I also find back hair to be revolting.  If I wanted back hair I’d have a dog.  (and I do have dogs… but) Dogs are supposed to be covered in hair.

This weekend was more relaxing than I had originally thought it would be.  Usually when Jerry is in Lancaster it is a lot quieter because then my only imperatives are cleaning and sleeping.  As hot as it was of course I had to limit my time outside but I did get some laundry and cleaning done. 

I know it sounds critical, but I can get so much more done when Jerry isn’t home demanding this or that.  Drop everything and do this or go here or get that…ad nauseam.  I’m one of those people who hates to be interrupted in the middle of something, especially when I am on my own time.  I don’t think he realizes what a drain he is on my stamina nor does he realize how demoralizing it is for me to constantly have to do things for him that big boys do for themselves.  What’s worse is that he can physically do things for himself but instead he chooses to harangue and threaten me into doing them for him.  It would be different if he were mentally deficient or crippled and couldn’t function for himself.   I know he is one of those people who wants to make a group project out of everything,  but far too often his idea of a group project is to make a mess and then watch me clean it up. 

I know I shouldn’t enable his infantile behavior but there comes a point where it is easier to just do it and get it over with.  Which battles are worth fighting?

Theoretically I know that appeasement is simply feeding alligators- it may buy a moment of time but the alligator is always going to want more. 

Anyway, on a lighter note, I have to say I am thankful for a lot of things today.  I am thankful that jellyfish can’t fly for instance.

I am also thankful that I am not the owner of this boat:

Intelligence is a constant, the population is growing.  At least I remembered to get my butt to Sally’s for more fiberglass wraps, and to get some more TP and paper towels before we ran out.  It is a sorry thing to be out of paper towels especially considering the dogs had Montezuma’s Revenge over the weekend and I ended up giving the rug cleaner a workout twice.  If only they would have the shits on the linoleum it would be so much easier to clean.  I think they do it on the carpet because they can’t get their footing to squat as well on the linoleum, but that’s just my theory.  It’s sad the things my mind will actually bother to ruminate on these days.

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