Politically Incorrect Theatre, a Lovely Hiatus, and Welcome to the Gallery of Fashion Don’ts

I know what I want for Christmas! A revolver always makes a lovely gift-to-self, no?

I already have a revolver (and it was a gift to myself) though it’s a Taurus, not a Colt.  I believe in the 2nd Amendment, and packing (i.e. legal concealed-carry) has become a reluctant necessity for some of us.  There are some places and situations that are just plain unsafe for a woman to go alone and unarmed today.  I don’t want to be a victim.  Better to be armed and never have to use it than to need protection and fail to have it.

I don’t believe that packing is the right option for everyone.  I hesitated for a very long time before finally deciding to get gun safety training (and even then it was on my Dad’s insistence) and to get my permit.  Much to my surprise, I discovered that I actually enjoy shooting, and I can hit a target with a .357 a lot better than I thought I could.  The shotgun (I also have a Mossberg 20 gauge) is a bit more of a challenge.  Most people have an easier time with a shotgun vs. a pistol, but go figure, the pistol is more effective for me.  That being said, I do think that no one should even consider owning a firearm until they’ve had general gun safety training.  Even with safety training, it is essential to become intimately acquainted with how your particular firearm works.

No, I did not go on a cruise, gay or otherwise, but I had a nice few days’ away.

The meaning of words can change drastically in the course of a generation or two.  It also used to be possible to entertain kids with a simple puppet show.  Today even the very youngest kids need to be occupied with electronic stimuli.  My granddaughter is five months old and is currently learning to push buttons so they will make noises.  Then again, she also chews on her toes in between bites of cereal and fruit when she eats, so she’s pretty easily entertained- now.  I am curious to see what it will take to entertain her in a year or so.  All I can suggest to Steve-o is that he might want that portable DVD player for the car.   If such a thing had existed when he was in car seats it might have saved me a lot of irritation, if having to listen to Thomas the Tank Engine, Pokémon, and Power Rangers ad nauseam would have been better than his incessant screaming.  That just might be a toss up, though Thomas was a lot less offensive than the damned dinosaur. (I couldn’t handle Barney. Thankfully, Steve-o didn’t care for him either.)

I might just get him that portable DVD the more I think about it.  I’m sure he will love all those various princess, My Little Pony, and Hello Kitty movies- that I’ll make sure she gets.

If you’re watching this swill for the plot, you have Problems.  Just plead that it’s only on so the kid will shut the eff up. Boys, no one will get it that you’re having fantasies about the horses’ hineys.

I had a really fun time with my granddaughter Friday and Saturday.  It’s scary, but she’s already crawling and sitting up and she’s not even six months old yet.  It won’t be long before she is getting into everything and wreaking general havoc.  Yes, grandchildren are the ultimate payback.  Now, Steve-o, you might just start understanding why Mom was so flipping paranoid about so many things.

Of course medical fun is on my agenda a lot more often than I’d like it to be.  Yesterday I got to get another blood draw (had already had one Thursday in anticipation of my Dr.s’ appointment yesterday) because the lab forgot to do the A1C test which is probably the main reason for getting my blood tested every three months to begin with.  I think the Dr. and the nurse were more upset about it than I was.  I don’t freak over blood draws, but I know some people do.  The nurse kept on apologizing for having to take my blood again, but it’s really no big deal.  Hopefully I get a three month reprieve on blood draws (until I have to do it before my next appointment in November) but whoop-de-doo.  It really doesn’t bother me anymore. As long as my clothes stay on, medical procedures truly don’t phase me.

This is really all it covers.  For the waist down, you get a paper sheet.  Joy and rapture.  Yeah.

The only Dr. appointment I find unnerving anymore is the paper-nightie one, regardless of who does it. The first time I had it done, (I was 16 and I really wanted to get on the pill, you know… so I went to the county health clinic rather than my family Dr. which turned out to be a Bad Idea,) the guy was a medical student, and he was more than a little rough with things, and that memory has given me the willies about this procedure ever since.   My current gynecologist is excellent- I can do nothing but applaud his repair work that is allowing me to live free of pelvic pain, and even three years later I am so thankful I had the hysterectomy/major repairs.  Although I know I have to get all that checked once a year to make sure the repairs are holding up and to verify that nothing else in that vicinity is screwing up, these days I don’t like taking off my clothes for any purposes other than showering.  I have always found pelvic exams and mammograms to be rather unpleasant, but I’d probably be twisted if I enjoyed it. (Necessary, yes- and guys, you are not off the hook- get that prostate check you’ve been putting off!)

Sunday we took our obligatory trip to the State Fair.  I like to go to the fair, if only to marvel at all the bizarre specimens of humanity.  You don’t have to pay for the freak show at the fair.  The freak show is free- just look around and you’ll get treated to:

Bad Tats-

Isn’t that special?

Completely inadequate coverage:

This looks good- how?

WTF?  On many levels.

Horrible hair designs:

Oh. Dear. Lord.

And completely stupid tat designs such as: (though I’d already included a bad tat, I saw plenty of really bad tats at the fair!)

Even when I have it, I don’t really want to advertise it.

I admit I forgot my camera this year, which really sucks, but I don’t think I’d had the courage to take a pic of the 500 lb she-behemoth snarfing a footlong corn dog in one bite even had the camera been handy.  That image has seared itself into my retinas.  Woof.

5 thoughts on “Politically Incorrect Theatre, a Lovely Hiatus, and Welcome to the Gallery of Fashion Don’ts

  1. So far I’ve been able to shield my Boys from the likes of Barney and the odious Spongebob Squarepants. They had a brief flirtation with the Teletubbies, enabled by my wife, but I quickly put the kibosh on that soft-brained inanity. However, we have now been to two Wiggles shows and gone to several “Days Out With Thomas.” Neither of which is a small thing, because events like that don’t come to my area, so we usually have to travel to LA or San Jose.

    The fair is fun. I’ve only been to a State Fair once–California’s as a kid. I won some photography thing, with a snazzy cash prize of like $3. Our local fair is pretty kickin’ actually. Because we live in the sticks we get decent acts–Aerosmith, Journey (near & dear to your heart, I know), Dylan and tons of top country acts (names I recognize, but don’t remember).

    I don’t own a gun, but I’m a big believer in gun-owner’s rights. West of the Rockies. outside of the big cities, a lot of people have grown up with guns. They’re very responsible with them (largely; I mean, idiots are everywhere), and they’re more a way of life than an extension of a dude’s penis. It irritates me that people who live in big cities (not you, obviously!) think that guns should be taken from EVERYBODY, not just folks living in or near their city.

    • Columbus is kind of weird for a big city. The metro area has a few small suburbs- I live in one of them, just on the other side of I-270- but otherwise we’re a city in the middle of a lot of rural farmland. The nearest somewhat large city to Columbus would probably be Dayton, about 70 miles west. So once you’ve gone ten miles or so outside the city limits you’re in the sticks- as in Deliverance, without the mountains or canoes. Many of the people who live in town or the adjacent suburbs came from the rural sticks looking for work- me included. I grew up in a backwater 50 miles north of town- all of Marion County is only 35,000- where it is not at all unusual to have guns and dogs, etc. I’ve been here almost 20 years, but I go back up north pretty often because my parents, my son and my granddaughter live there.

      Lots of people in Ohio pack, and nobody says much about it, except maybe for the liberal wieners in Cleveland, up in Kucinich-land.

      In places like Ohio, 50 miles out is a world away. Believe that. I get culture shock every time I go up there. Yesterday I was treated to the visual of a pack of rednecks attempting to get a completely worthless hosed out 70’s or early 80’s GM “G” body (couldn’t tell if it was a Monte Carlo or a Cutlass Supreme, because there wasn’t enough of it there to tell) up on jackstands. In the front yard. After what appeared to be a LOT of beer, from the look of all the PBR cans all over the yard. One of the dudes almost completely lost his pants in the process which was kind of funny.

      I didn’t have to take Steve-o to Taco Bell or go to WalMart, so I was spared the worst of the she-behemoths and Dudes With Bad Tats.

      Note to self: next time I’m up there- sneak the camera in the Marion WalMart and get some good pix.

  2. whiteladyinthehood says:

    I own a gun. I wasn’t too crazy about the idea at first. But, simply due to where I live and after being robbed a couple of times it seemed better to have one. My brother and husband took me out to the woods one day and showed me how to hold it, shoot it, load and unload it – I was a crack shot! I enjoyed it.

    • I enjoyed shooting a lot more than I thought I would. It helps to talk to someone who knows firearms and can help fit you to a firearm that meets your needs. I’m not comfortable with semi-automatics, and I didn’t pick the most expensive revolver (that would have been the Smith & Wesson) but I did choose one that is very close in quality and is well-balanced and accurate. If only I could get as accurate with the shotgun, which is funny, because Jerry and my Dad both are better with shotguns than with pistols.

      In Ohio you have to take a concealed carry class and get a permit if you want to be able to carry a firearm, but you can have them on your property and you can go hunting with a rifle or shotgun without the permit. (Hunting does require a hunting license, which involves some proof of gun safety training.) I got the CCW permit because there are times I have to drive through some unsavory areas at night, and I never did like going out at night alone even in “good” parts of town. I think not knowing who’s packing gives some thugs pause regarding carjacking, which used to be a real problem here in Central Ohio, before the the state initiated CCW. You can’t tell who’s got a loaded .357 in the car, (or a 9mm, or whatever) which can serve as a deterrent to someone with at least a scrap of a rational mind. Try to car-jack my car. Bad idea.

      If your state allows concealed carry you may want to investigate it, if you’ve not already, and the gun safety class is a great idea whether you want a permit or not.

      • whiteladyinthehood says:

        That’s great info. Thank you. (I probably do need to take a class). And I have actually taken the Hunter’s Ed class though I’m not a hunter. I have given much thought to getting a permit to carry it in my car but since I work for an elementary school – I’m not sure I would be allowed to have it in my car…I’ll have to check into it….

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